Selfish
Self-Pity
That’s me today
Can’t concentrate
On anything
Apart from gradual decay
No oil in the engine
Feeling dry
Trying to encounter
Some grand design
Thoughts dwell where they should not
“Empty”
“Vacant”
Let’s give it a shot
Can’t concentrate on anything
I can hear
The worms!!
The ground is breaking and shaking
Beneath me
I can see the voices
“Returning”
“Taunting”
Self-deceiving
Always misleading
A confused tumble of forgotten denials
I’m just doing it for the money
Like everybody else
Selling my body
So I’m not left out
Outside with the gold
Glazed interest
No life behind the eyes
Songs, traffic and corruption
Cigarettes and alibis
I can still see the box
Too heavy to carry
“Heavy”
“Failure”
Stumbling and tripping
To the sounds of odd music
Selfish
Self-Pity
That’s you
Intrinsic in all your concealed behaviour
I have seen light
And experienced faith
An essence ineffable
In a shadow’s delight
©John de Gruyther 2013
The World Outside the Window 
This is raw powerful stuff. Was wondering how it would be if you changed it to the third person…? just an idea and probably not what you wanted! 🙂
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Thanks Rachael, I’m experimenting with telling stories via characters in poems, so that’s a really interesting suggestion! Some of it is drawn from me, but I like playing with the perception that a poem is always from the authors perspective! So I’m trying to get different voices within the same piece, if that makes sense? So your suggestion is an excellent one and is something I might play with for the sequel 🙂 Thanks for the suggestion, I will play around and let you know the results 🙂
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Glad you didn’t mind me saying! I find it really useful sometimes to switch between first and third – it can completely change a piece. Really enjoyed it. 🙂
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I don’t mind at all 🙂 I particularly value your feedback. Glad you liked it..
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love this
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